Red, dying.

What kind of series needs rebooting twice over? Apparently one whose starrer can’t be given up on just because of “brand fatigue” (that’s a different point of discussion altogether). Lara Croft’s too precious to lose, you see, so much so that she’s had three different lives to live.

Here we lay out five key differences of the three histories of Lara, the three canon continuities we all had a chance to play and know of first hand. To detail, the First Continuity consists of the series of Core Design games, the Second spans Anniversary, Legend and Underworld, and Third starts with the new-era Tomb Raider brand, the one that stars the newly shit-drenched Lara Croft.

Don’t expect to solve puzzles in Tomb Raider; there won’t be any

In their place, “Survival Escapes” — cerebral challenges that are contextualized as must-do’s in order for Lara to survive.

Gone are the contrived puzzles of earlier games. Instead of activating age-old mechanisms (that surprisingly still work!), Lara now has to find ways and tools and places and the skills to make things work, through her own means, all in the hopes of getting out of the island alive. Yay or yay?

[Game Informer #213]

Or, as a note to the chaps at Visual Works and Redwood HQ, “Why consistency across key artworks is important.”

Do you remember what it felt like watching the Bond films before Daniel Craig came in? There were all kinds of shiny — the guns, the gadgets, the cars, and the ladies’ legs. You’d watch it, because it was fun, but you didn’t feel like rooting for that tux-donning gentleman named Bond through all his travails, walking through them in one piece, invulnerably, in suave fashion, with nary a hint of “ugh,” “aaagh!” or “ouch.”

Do you remember what it felt like watching the Bond films when Daniel Craig came in? You’d gasp for breath when he jumps from one building roof to another, hundreds of feet above solid ground, already bruised and bleeding.

And you’d root for this guy because you knew he had motivation, there was a personal struggle for him, and through all his travails, he visibly got punched with an “oomph,” got knife-actioned with an “aaagh,” and literally got beat up in the balls with an “AAAGH!”

That’s why for Daniel Carrapa, architect, gamer and blogger, “like going through pre-Daniel Craig Bond movies,” the main problem for Lara Croft “is that along the way they forgot to develop Lara into a fully grown character.”

And he’s not talking about her breasts. In fact, he talks about, in writing, why the reboot is needed — good stuff that we just felt the need to reblog. Because here at Reads to Raid, we repost things we wish we wrote, but alas didn’t.

“You didn’t reboot anything, you just got shit on your face”

While hilarious (we actually laughed out loud), it would be interesting to see if that’s all there is to the new-era Tomb Raider — getting Lara drenched in shit.

Fingers glued and crossed and taped twice over that won’t be the case.

Game Informer unveils new face of Lara, triggers a thousand whines

In true Helen fashion, one look at Lara and you know there’s bound to be drama. On one hand, we’ve half the fandom rejoicing. On the other, well, ships are setting sail to launch cannon balls onto that already-battered face.

As for us, we’re on neither side of the fence. Notebook in hand, observant as gods were during the wars we are.

[Game Informer]

Forget everything you know about Tomb Raider BIZ

Because we’ve… REBOOTED!

To the few readers who’ve checked our website from day to day, thanks for your patience, for sticking by. Tomb Raider BIZ is back in full speed, and we’ve loads to tell. In the meantime, feel free to comment below (or drop us a message via our Sexy Dropbox) about the site’s rebooted look.

Following management shake-up at Warner Bros, the planned origins movie for Lara Croft, previously in works at L1N Pictures, is now officially ta-ta, with movie rights to the long-running series given up by the company. Your take?

More than a year after details of a Tomb Raider reboot wildfired through the interwebs, gaming magazine PC Gamer via its The Spy column rumor-mongers anew as to Lara’s next big adventure.